One time, we had a grand time at therapy when Joaquin attempted to tell a groupmate, also autistic and nonverbal, about his fingers. At another time, Joaquin took his therapist’s fingers, which were painted with red nail polish. When I shared this to Tammy, a friend who’s an autistic adult, he helped me reconcile in my mind what I previously struggled to understand: how is it possible for autistic people who struggle with social blindness to also be empathetic? Given that many autistic people feel very deeply for others, how does that square with difficulty socializing? Tammy explained, and I quote verbatim: "The incident with the therapist’s nails sounds just like autistic hyper-empathy - difficulty with understanding the perspectives of other people in a social setting, but experiencing a strong transference of emotion when somebody looks like they might be in pain. " He talked about when as a child, he held a funeral for a balloon he was to deflate. "So is this why autistic people get overwhelmed easily? " I asked Tammy. "Because autistic people with hyper-empathy feel others’ pain like it’s a bodily sensation? " "100% on the overwhelm, " he replied

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