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My reaction would be “holy shit you’re actually still alive.”
Convenient since my mum passed away a few days ago actually.
Happy Easter!
Thanks, you too.
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I am really sorry for your loss. I wish peace and healing to you and all who loved your mother.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
They’ve been together over 40 years, I’d be fairly surprised. But if that’s who they are, I’d obviously support both of them.
I would suddenly feel very sad for the one of them that bottled it up for 40 years, and for the other who obviously has known for many of those years…
Sometimes they are really good at hiding it for 40 years, leading to even worse heart break. Surely there was some denial involved, but still…
I’d be fucking pissed. You disowned me for how fucking long over my queerness and were gay the whole time‽
If mom was still alive and gay I’d be surprised but happy for her and probably try to set her up with someone. She actually took me to my first gay bar.
Upvote for interrobang
One of my kids is trans and pan. The other is lesbian. My niece is trans and lesbian. My other nibling (look it up) is gender-fluid. My sister is bisexual. My aunt was lesbian. I have multiple gay uncles and grand-uncles.
There are a lot of LGBTQ+ people in my extended family, on both sides, and it’s not a small family. So if either came out as gay, I wouldn’t be particularly surprised.
Especially if it’s my mother, who is already out as bisexual.
As for how I’d react? Mostly by saying, “Thank you for telling me, that must have been very hard for you.” No recrimination or anger, of course. I love my parents, and either of them coming out wouldn’t affect that in the slightest.
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My mom? Thank heavens, her taste in men is TRASH. Surely her taste in women has to be better.
Dad? I’d tell whoever told me that I don’t care what my dad is up to.
You’d think but she’d just bring home a Shane type
So funnily enough, she has had romantic interest in 2-3 women in her life who were very close friends that were gregarious, successful,kind, and independent.
But she wasn’t actually attracted to them. It’s like her brain recognized “oh hey these people would be wonderful to have has life partners.”
But she’s not attracted to women. So yeah still hoping she’ll decide she likes women. Cause my dad was rock bottom and her recent boy friends were looking for a new mom to take care of them at 55.
So yeah, her taste in women would hopefully stay high if she decides she is gay!
Any gay person who comes out in my circle will get unconditional support.
My mother loathes the fact that my brother is gay, not even for religion reasons but because she’s psychotic, so for her to come out would be highly satisfying because then maybe I could make her feel bad about it the way she makes him feel, cunt that she is.
I know they won’t, because my parents are devout Muslims.
My actual parents, or hypothetical parents?
My real ones, it would be fine. They’ve always backed me being active with gay rights issues going back to the eighties. They had no issues with my openly gay friends. They even let two of those friends live with us for a while. So, if it turned out they were gay the entire time, it might be a bit surprising that it took so long to come out to me, when I’m the extended family’s established “safe out” person; I’m the one the people in the family come to for that because I’ve been very open about support.
Hypothetically, if it weren’t my actual parents, it would really depend on the circumstances how I would show support. Someone coming out to you is a big deal. They’ll have individual needs and hopes from the decision, so navigating that without a history to pull from for predicting those needs and hopes can be thorny.
Like, some folks want the support to be super casual, like “Yeah? Cool, what’s for dinner?”. Others might need hugs and reassurance, or calm verbal recognition, or even celebration. It could be anything; there’s some folks that want/need it to be a little opposed or otherwise rocky because they can’t believe, in their hearts, that it’s possible for it to go smoothly. Without a little “drama”, they stay stressed. Mind you, I’m not really able to do real drama, though I can fake being upset it didn’t happen sooner as long as I can make it lighthearted and a little jokey.
Seriously, anyone reading this far, be the person that people come out to early on in their process of coming out. It’s such a beautiful thing to be part of.
it would deeply pain me that they’ve had to suffer staying in the closet for so long, but i would be happy that they are now free to be what they feel they need to be.
I would feel very sorry for both of them.
My parents are in their 80s. They’ve been married 50+ years. I know that they came very close to divorce at one point, and ultimately only stayed together because their religion says that you shouldn’t divorce (except in cases of physical abuse and infidelity). To discover that they had stayed married, and both of them miserable, for 50+ years because of a bullshit religion would be heartbreaking.
I’d be very surprised because neither of them have ever struck me as even so much as being bi (and I am, so I feel like my gaydar is at least tuned in a bit), but if either of them did come out, I would of course be very supportive.
I can’t know how I would react unless that actually happens.
This is really important for people to understand.
