I make a solid effort to take care of myself, present myself as best I can, and find joy in the things that I do. I’ve also been mostly alone for a long time, not by choice, and I feel it’s likely that has to do with my appearance. I’m okay with that. I still view my own image positively, though I don’t think others do. I accept that’s not due to anyone’s malice - since when I look at others, I’m susceptible to standards of beauty as well.
Still, whenever that comes up in online discussions like this one, people seem magnetized to the belief I have this “ugly personality” to be alone. Some people do - that much is true. But it’s also long been the case that not everyone has an equal and fair shot in life. I’m also glad I wasn’t born to an impoverished African country with no running water.
Humans are, sadly, wired to associate beauty with morality and talent, and reversely, to associate ugliness with immorality, and even though we have increasing proof of this bias, plenty of people would sooner judge complete strangers from the comfort of their PC chairs than engage in a little self-reflection. I consider myself slightly handsome, but I’ll still get shit until the end of my days because my mannerisms as an autistic person are considered alien. If it’s any consolation, finding friendship and love with these handicaps is not impossible, just harder.
I kind of mesh with this thought.
I make a solid effort to take care of myself, present myself as best I can, and find joy in the things that I do. I’ve also been mostly alone for a long time, not by choice, and I feel it’s likely that has to do with my appearance. I’m okay with that. I still view my own image positively, though I don’t think others do. I accept that’s not due to anyone’s malice - since when I look at others, I’m susceptible to standards of beauty as well.
Still, whenever that comes up in online discussions like this one, people seem magnetized to the belief I have this “ugly personality” to be alone. Some people do - that much is true. But it’s also long been the case that not everyone has an equal and fair shot in life. I’m also glad I wasn’t born to an impoverished African country with no running water.
Humans are, sadly, wired to associate beauty with morality and talent, and reversely, to associate ugliness with immorality, and even though we have increasing proof of this bias, plenty of people would sooner judge complete strangers from the comfort of their PC chairs than engage in a little self-reflection. I consider myself slightly handsome, but I’ll still get shit until the end of my days because my mannerisms as an autistic person are considered alien. If it’s any consolation, finding friendship and love with these handicaps is not impossible, just harder.