• starlinguk@kbin.social
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      24
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      All your symptoms are caused by being a woman!

      Half a year later: just kidding, it was cancer, too late now.

    • spaduf@slrpnk.netOPM
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      14
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      This is great context. Particularly as it highlights the differences in gendered experiences. For women it’s in some ways a demand for attractiveness while for men it’s more of a literal command that is more likely to be used in self policing (that is men policing masculine expectations of other men). Also notable that both sentiments seem to be more likely to come from men.

      • Roundcat@kbin.social
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        25
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        As someone who presents masculine, I have gotten the “be a man” treatment from women several times. Ultimately it does come from a patriarchal standard of society, but its something that is perpetuated by everyone, consciously or otherwise. Not discounting what you are saying, but I think it’s important to highlight that toxic masculinity can come from anywhere.

        • spaduf@slrpnk.netOPM
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          9
          ·
          1 year ago

          This is absolutely true. I’ve thought about this a lot in reference to a study I once saw on how early education professionals are far more likely to be right-leaning women and how that plays into this phenomena (a cursory google search did not turn up a wealth of evidence so take that with a grain of salt). Particularly because I think that policing of masculinity from women in positions of authority can be incredibly salient for young boys. Unfortunately, for some it is unlikely that they will be exposed to a more feminist perspective until later in life, sometimes much later.

          • Cabrio@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            10
            arrow-down
            1
            ·
            1 year ago

            It’s because ultimately we all value ‘strength’ (of varying sorts) over ‘weakness’. We are still far from socially internalising “strength is being able to show weakness”, because in part you need to be strong to deal with the expected pushback of being OK with being ‘weak’.

        • wewbull@feddit.uk
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          7
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          1 year ago

          I think “be a man” is a demand for attractiveness too. It’s said by women that want A MAN.