- cross-posted to:
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- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
You know the Bank of Mum and Dad when you see it: it’s your friend who seems broke, but always has a safety net, or who suddenly (but discreetly) acquires the deposit for a home. It’s those who stayed with their parents while they saved for a flat, or stuck it out in a profession they were passionate about even though the wages are chronically low. It’s those who do not need to consider the financial costs of having children. It’s those whose grandparents are covering nursery or university fees, with the Bank of Grandma and Grandad already driving an economic wedge between different cohorts in generations Alpha (born between 2010 and 2024) and Z (born in the late 1990s and early 2000s).
This is the picture we know, but the Bank of Mum and Dad is not just a luxury confined to the 1% – it is also evident in families like mine. I grew up in a working-class household and was the first person in my family to get a degree, but it was the fact my parents had scrimped in the 1980s to purchase properties in London (and allowed me to crash in one throughout my 20s) that has arguably been the true source of opportunities in my life.
In recent years, we have rightly widened the conversation about privilege in society. And yet how honest are we about one of the most obvious forces shaping anyone under 45: the presence or absence of a parental safety net? The truth is that we live in an inheritocracy. If you’ve grown up in the 21st century, your opportunities are increasingly determined by your access to the Bank of Mum and Dad, rather than by what you earn or learn. The economic roots of this story go back to the 1980s, but it accelerated after the 2008 financial crisis, as private wealth soared and wage growth stalled. In the 2020s, rather than a meritocracy – where hard work pays off – we have evolved into an inheritocracy, based on family wealth.
We have never lived in a meritocracy. That is just some bullshit billionaires will tell you while you work yourself into an early grave.
And here’s some free life advice: If you can stand to be around your parents once you reach early adulthood, continue to live with them. Life is cheaper in groups. Pay some rent and your share, but you’ll find it a lot easier to save money for your own place when some leech landlord isn’t funnelling all your hard earned money off to their own retirement fund.
Yes and no. Back in the 50s-90s you could really either live cheaply or work hard and get ahead with some skill and some luck.
Now you can’t really do either.
Ask ppl in their 80s if they ever worried about their kids being able to make a living by hard work alone and they’ll tell you no every time.
That opportunity to get ahead by hard work is gone… But it used to be there for everyone
I think this is really bullshit. It’s harder than it was, absolutely. But you can do it, it just takes sacrifices which people these days seem to want none of.
You always hear about people’s grand/parents moving to some town and starting a life. And it’s viewed romantically but in reality, it was likely a sacrifice.
Earning $15k above the median salary with a partner earning minimum wage, I managed to save enough for a house deposit in about 18 months. With nothing but a diploma I got in 12 months. It sucked, I never went out, cooked nearly every night and had very few indulgences. I moved over an hour away from where I grew up and I had no help. This is in one of the top 10 expensive property cities in the world.
It can be done, don’t be so negative.
Ah yes, remind me when was that. And now adjust your past income for inflation, and take into consideration the rents and the real estate prices and tell us if you could do the same now.
We all know the answer.