It makes sense that you would be scared - it sounds like you haven’t been in too many situations where people around you have been helpful. First things first- your arm. The best thing, if you can access them, is steri strips or butterfly closures. Close any open wounds with these, use some antibiotic ointment a few times a day, and cover it with a bandage, and keep it clean until it’s fully healed. If you think there is anything more complicated than a skin injury going on, i really would urge you to seek medical attention. It is better to get caught than it is to get an infection. BioOil is pretty good for lessening scars. Project Lets also has a list of alternatives to self harm. Most of the suggestions probably sound increddddibly irritating and unhelpful at first, but you would be surprised how many of them actually work. If you feel an urge to hurt yourself in the future, try a few things off the list. The best thing is to get those emotions OUT of your body, and not to repress them, or shame yourself for feeling them, or judge yourself for expressing them in messy ways. Trapped pain has to come out somehow, so if you can find a way to get to it before it becomes as severe, that can reduce self harm urges a lot. https://projectlets.org/alternatives-to-selfharm

Seeking help can be incredibly overwhelming and scary. Mental health services are far from perfect in most places, and I definitely do want to echo @[email protected] ’s advice on checking the regulations in your area regarding confidentiality. But i would make the argument that when things feel bad enough that you don’t feel safe at all or you aren’t sure how to keep going, the fears and drawbacks that come with seeking help from a flawed system are well worth it if they get you through to the other side. This of course depends on your situation. Ultimately, you are the one who knows your own situation best, you know more about your life and your region than I do. You are the one who gets to choose what you think the safest and most helpful option for you is, based on the information you have and the way you feel. Always do what makes you safest. If anything I’ve written here seems wrong to you, or feels condescending, ignore it. I can only tell you what worked/what would have worked for me based on my own experiences. But above all all, please take care of yourself (and your arm). It probably doesn’t seem that important right now, but it is.