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The original was posted on /r/aitah by /u/Wookiesar on 2023-10-06 18:06:27.

Me and my boyfriend were talking about the type of rings we bought for each other (engagement). I said I did not want him to waste so much money in a ring because I just felt bad about that much money going into a ring instead of something else like a down payment etc. He told me the ring had cost him about $5,000, which I saw as an absurd amount of money to spend in a engagement ring. He had told me that the ring represents me entirely, and it had my name on it (not literally), that it just “looked like me”. After that, we talked about the true origin of the ring, and he actually told me that it was not made for me, it was his mother’s ring that his father had given to her when they got married. The “problem” starts with the fact that they got divorced, their marriage was not a happy one and my boyfriend’s memories of the divorce process are very negative, of course. And so I feel like the history behind the ring it’s not really appropriate or represents the type of marriage my boyfriend and I aspire to have. Instead, I discussed with him about the possibility of selling the ring and buying me an engagement ring that is WAY less expensive and simpler. The rest of the money left from this exchange was agreed to be split between my boyfriend and his mom. Am I the asshole for not accepting the ring?