• magikmw@lemm.ee
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    5 months ago

    I got told off I overcuddle my daughter because I pick her up from kindergarten twice a week (and I drop her off every day).

    I can’t wrap my head around the logic.

    • owenfromcanada@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      The logic is men who are so emotionally crippled that any display of empathy or affection threatens their fragile sense of masculinity and undermines their false sense of worth as solely a financial provider, which feeds into their fears of what they’ve missed, so they ridicule and insult as a defense mechanism. Or something.

      • nomous@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        That would explain the reaction from men but not similar reactions from women, which are even more common in my experience.

        • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          The logic is women who are so emotionally crippled that any display of empathy or affection by men threatens their fragile sense of femininity and undermines their false sense of worth as solely a nurturer.

          • nomous@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            This makes sense and kind of echoes what the other commenter was saying. People have internalized norms/societal expectations and any deviation from it caused dissonance. People really do just look for any way to “other” others.

        • owenfromcanada@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Can’t say I can relate–in my experience, women have been the ones who either think nothing of it or approve more (though it can border on infantalizing). But I’ve known some women who internalized the mysogyny they grew up in, and anything departing from “traditional” (i.e., toxic) masculinity in men threatens their worldview.

          Our worldview is a bit like our gums–forms at an early age, and if we don’t regularly “floss” (challenging ourselves with growth and listening to differing perspectives), any challenge causes pain and discomfort. Flossing, like growing a worldview, isn’t pleasant at first, but we’re much healthier for it.