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Can someone get Pastor Locke to show me the passage in the Bible that says that “acting stupid” is an abomination worthy of death, so says the Lord?
Better yet, can’t someone get a terroristic threat filed against him/this church for this?
Or at least notify the IRS this is a GOP promotion agency cosplaying as a religious group in order to evade taxes?
Barring either, can we at least get a few Covid-positive carriers to swing by and sing a few hymns and kiss a few babies, maybe sneeze in the offering plate a few times?
Nope. There is no legal threat here.
“We simply ask that you not wear a facemask in our church as it goes against our faith.”
Can I bring my conceal carry? Or perhaps open-carry (local laws allowing)?
“Sure! As long as you don’t transgress on our congregation. We will defend ourselves if called to though.”
See how that works? No threat at all. I’m good so far.
Aight. I need a 6’8" brown brethren to walk in with me wearing a tactical vest, loaded with 6x 30-round mags of 5.56 green-tip, JHP. For self-defense. Sounds like the kinda place a man like that would need such a rig, and I’m not joking. And imma stand behind him…
What’s everyone shitting about? Ain’t we here to be bathed in the blood of the lamb? I came here to learn about eternal peace.
And this part is real. Listen.
Hell, I’m a middle-aged white boy, atheist you might call me. Finest service I ever attended was a mix of white and black folk in the back woods of Mississippi. That church ain’t even on a map. Kinda country you can really see the Milky Way, really see it. Surrounded by cotton fields in bloom. And if you ain’t seen something like that, I’m truly sorry. It’s a sight to see. But your cell phone won’t work, have to get home to upload those pics.
Fine folks, gettin’ along, truly praising their Lord, singing and waving flags. Weird to me, but whatever, they were good people, and they were happy. Huggin’ and kissin’ each other, before and after the service. Again, not joking or making fun. Those folks were kin, black or white, didn’t matter.
If you got a mixed message from all that, you were meant to. Because the truth is all mixed up when you get down to Earth and have a close look at it.
Omg I should have done that last month!!!
It’s right after the Jesus wants me to have a private jet chapter.
In the name of our lord and saviour youre entitled to do as you please, including denying that lord and saviour at every turn. Jesus died so you just go ahead and get yours and then declare that youre forgiven. “Yours” can include killing others to be viciously petty, just be an “american christian”.
Its so enticing, I just cant see how or why religion and faith is in its death throws…/s
I agree, but just going to be grammar pedantic and point out it’s “throes”.
Wouldn’t that be “spelling pedantic”? ;)
Is spelling part of grammar?
but just going to be grammar pedantic
…but I’m just going to be a spelling pedantic…
I’m not perfect, myself. But anyway, I don’t think one would say “a pedantic” given that it’s an adjective.
Haha, well spotted; should of bin “pedant”.
I dunno.
But I support these dumbasses in killing themselves off.
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While it’s not spelled out in explicit language, there are actually a number of examples we can infer from. 🙂 Fairly well-read ex-Christian. A lot of “FAFO” material, fittingly, is found in the Old Testament & the way God dealt with Israel. I’m only going to briefly touch on these, religion took 25 years of my life & I’m not up for hours-long debates over nothing anymore.
There were lots of rules surrounding the ark of the covenant. It was being transported via cart, and it was about to fall. Uzzah reached out & touched it to steady it; the anger of the Lord burned against him & he died on the spot.
Uzzah did nothing wrong per se; he was trying to be helpful. But the AotC was designed to be carried with 2 poles that fit through rings on the side, so as not to be touched by human hands. Especially non-priests. Uzzah died in the same way as a child playing with a downed power line because it looks like a big, black snake. Lack of knowledge. He fucked around & found out.
Moses was instructed to speak to a rock & water would come out. He disobeyed & struck the rock instead. Though he did not die immediately as a result, he was denied entry into the Promised Land. He fucked around & found out.
New Testament: A couple landowners sold their field & made a big show about how they were donating the money to the church, disciples. Husband & wife were questioned individually & asked if the amount donated was the price the field got, in full. Both lied, both died, they fucked around & found out.
…all that to say, Christianity isn’t to be labeled as a purely pacifist religion. That’s not correct. And when people “act stupid”, consequences are administered. Yes, even sometimes death, sometimes God would kill them himself or order the killing. Obedience is very highly valued in Christianity, do what is right, do it correctly, do not lie (with some notable exceptions), do as I say…or else.
Let death take my enemies by surprise; let them go down alive to the realm of the dead, for evil finds lodging among them.
~ Psalms 55:15
For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.
~ Romans 13:4
I’m pretty sure neither of those says ‘acting stupid’ is an abomination worthy of death…
I’m not sure “act stupid” is an idiom that existed at the time the scriptures were written. But “do wrong” comes close enough. And the implication of the term is that you’re engaging in some kind of threatening behavior, which would qualify you as one of “my enemies”.
Considering they were asked if they had guns and not threatened with guns, I’m not sure how that was threatening behavior.
The devil can cite scripture for his purpose
— William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice
Celebrate faith over fear but also we have guns and we will kill you.
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If you think Christianity is about peace, love, and acceptance, you’ve never read the Bible.
I mean… doesn’t it technically only become Christianity with the new testament? Old testament doesn’t even have that guy, it’s just God being a dick. The Christ dude had a good message, but I think that’s why they killed him.
Like I said, you haven’t read the new testament. I went to a Episcopalian- affiliated school so I’ve had to pass tests on the damn thing.
Now, for the record, I think Episcopalians have chosen to disobey the clear directions of their ostensible holy book to allow (e.g.) ordination of women and acceptance of some types of queer people, so I do have respect for that denomination to the extent that they deliberately misinterpret the Bible to not be a bunch of assholes.
But the religion itself? Nah.
Jesus is one of the best critics of religious phonies ever (particularly in Matthew), but he also frankly fetishized punishing people who didn’t worship him with sufficient alacrity.
Episcopalians strike me as a bunch of decent people trying real hard to make the best of a shit sandwich.
You didn’t say “you haven’t read the new testement” you said the Bible… I was being pedantic in that Christ was in the new testement, CHRISTianity and all that. I’m not religious, nor was I trying to argue the hypocrisy of this particular one. Although I do find it a funny coincidence that you listed the denomination I had been raised with. OoOOoh, maybe it’s a sign there really IS a God!?
You’re right, there is a God. Send me 10% of your paycheck every two weeks and I’ll put in a good word.
Also: no fapping.
That’s more than tithes usually cost… so that must mean YOUR God is better, being more expensive! Sign me up!
…can I just apologize in a closet to you for fapping like usual?
We do the fapologia face to face now.
He shall remain unclean as long as he has the disease; he is unclean. He shall live alone; his dwelling shall be outside the camp.
- Leviticus 13:46
Pastor McShooty here somehow thinks that responsible disease management and reducing contagion isn’t Biblical?
If so, why doesn’t this part of Leviticus say “just have faith about it”? Like it’s a pretty long section talking about physical inspections to try to determine between contagious and non-contiguous diseases and to separate from contagious people.
Seems unnecessary for the Pastor here though, as he just has faith.
I wonder if he’s consistent such that he’s similarly dismissive of other parts of Leviticus, such as chapter 18…
This dude doesn’t read the Bible for context he reads the Bible for the parts that give him power.
Sadly, that probably applies to the supermajority of Christians in America.
It also applies to every religion ever
Edit- in the idea that all religious books were written by men, in order to exert power in some way over another man
Growing up as an evangelical, I was basically taught to ignore the old testament, because Jesus dying changed all the rules.
Except for anything about homosexuals and women. Those parts still apply somehow.
On multiple occasions God instructed people in the Bible how to make a medicine. Fuck idiots.
And to socially distance when sick.
And make unclean people sleep outside.
Fuck idiots.
If we did that, then we’d just end up with more idiots.
Speedrun to President Camacho!
Dammit, that’s very similar to the joke response my housemate makes xD
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I should read that book sometime… clearly it isn’t as dumb as I tought, as it seems is more sane that some people that act based on it are.
It’s probably not a very interesting read if you haven’t been groomed early
The story is shit, the wording is weird and the list of characters is longer than in Game of thrones
I wouldn’t bother with it, a broken clock is right twice a day as well.
Coming from Christianity, now atheist/agnostic, I second the “don’t bother” comment. Idk it’s got a good amount of good advice, but it’s a massive timesink & frankly I don’t respect a group of people that know the Bible backwards, forwards, and sideways but conveniently, repeatedly ignore 1/10 of the Bible that says hey, love thy neighbor & don’t be a raging dickhead.
One must wonder if it being a massive timesink was purposefully crafted as such, so it can be read/reread/studied/argued over/twisted to fit various agendas. It keeps people busy. It (SHOULD) keep them “in line” /out of trouble. And it can be used to control, manipulate the common people into doing what you want.
“I’m not playing Democrat games” no you’re not, you’re just playing Republican propaganda games you fucking Fox news rotted brain jackoff…
Comments like this should get rid of their tax exempt status I believe.
If only. I found out recently the federal law that is supposed to prevent political endorsements only applies to endorsing specific politicians and allows for churches to endorse legislation. It’s bullshit.
And God said “Wat chu lookin at, boy”
“Show up acting stupid and find out”
Jimbob 7:11
Cleetus, the slack-jawed yokel…
Did she forget that the core of her entire religion is fear? What does the term “god-fearing” mean to her?
Religious fucks: “We follow christ.”
Also religious fucks: “I’ll fucking shoot you in your lgbtq liberal shitstain face.”
Like bruh did I miss the day in Sunday school when they talked about how Christ hated homeless people, drug addicts, and people that need health insurance or food?
How is this not threating langauge?
Tbf it’s just a less explicit “fuck around and find out.” I don’t think it’s actionable.
“We celebrate faith over fear…also we might shoot you.” 🤷♂️
…because we’re scared of you and masks
No one attending church needs to be reminded to show up stupid.
One of my go tos (there are a handful of people in my life who go to church occasionally but are aware enough to know it’s ridiculous) is “going to church? why? Here, Sit down. I’ll lie to you for an hour. And at least this way you can smoke weed while you listen to someone’s bullshit”
I actually don’t understand, is it a gun free campus?
No, by “find out,” the pastor meant “we’ll shoot you”
Ah, my favorite commandment. “Thou shall commit murder if someone shows up to your backwater Church practicing basic public health etiquette.”
I mean, shooting bullets could probably be considered a (more efficient) form of stoning someone. It checks out lol
It’s every church’s motto.
