Exactly - this is a pretty good overview of the idea and the research behind it. We’ve always wanted to believe that people are fundamentally rational beings but it just isn’t true lol.

Most people vote on vibes - that’s what the data always shows. They follow their peers, community, maybe a trusted authority figure. They are not, and have never been informed on issues, and they aren’t interested in learning more about them. I think those of us who do try to stay informed fall into the trap of thinking “if these folks were only better educated about this issue they would vote differently”. But that has never been and will never be true. Gotta project better vibes, baby!

There are plenty of Americans who suffer from the exact same kind of social anxiety and lack of social confidence that you’re describing. If you’re only meeting or observing Americans who are traveling or living in Germany then your sample is skewed towards the kind of people who have the confidence and experience to travel internationally.

It sounds to me like you would benefit from talking to a therapist who could help you manage your social anxiety, but if you didn’t want to do that for whatever reason, I would try treating small talk as a skill that you’re trying to get better at. Set yourself a small daily goal - like having one chat about the weather with a cashier while you’re shopping. You can’t skip right to being an expert at small talk; you need to gain confidence and experience. I would like to say to you, in my experience, it’s easiest to talk about things you’re interested in or passionate about. Are there any groups or clubs that meet to engage in hobbies you like? A group like that can help you break through the awkwardness of not knowing what to talk about.

Personally, I think you sound like a thoughtful, interesting person, and I bet you’d be fun to talk to. Don’t be so hard on yourself, and remember that everyone has these feelings; it’s perfectly natural and not something to get down on yourself about. Sorry for writing a whole novel, but I hope this was helpful in some small way!

I think the fundamental truth here is that any relationship requires conscious effort from both parties. One person alone can’t carry that weight. If your friend wants to salvage this relationship then I think they need to convince their partner to pursue individual therapy, and also they need to talk to a couples counselor together. Without professional help I think it’s going to be very difficult to shift the dynamic here. That being said, life is short, and you can waste years hoping that someone will change. Sometimes you have to make the hard choice to move on.

Are you like, on the Halliburton payroll or something?

He’s also trying to draw attention away from the illegal deportations they did over the weekend.

Imagine taking anything James Carville has to say seriously, or unironically using the word “woke” to describe things, or reading a Breitbart “article”. The mind boggles…truly a mysterious country in there lol.

I think you’re going to keep finding reasons why it’s Ukraine’s fault no matter what I or anyone say!s! I won’t waste any more time on this. The fact remains that Russia has broken pretty much every agreement they’ve ever struck with Ukraine since at least 2014, and Ukraine has zero incentive to enter into a new one without the force to ensure it’s followed. Their only choice is to try and wear Russia down with prolonged conflict.

Except, again, there’s no reason to believe that Russia was negotiating in good faith, and it sounds like the inclusion of security guarantees from the West is one of the reasons the talks broke down.

Again, Russia has broken basically every treaty and agreement they’ve ever made with Ukraine.

https://thedispatch.com/article/russia-history-broken-treaties-agreements/?signup=success

Simply put, the Russians can’t be trusted to honor any agreement that’s not backed up by force. Their “terms” aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on. They’ve never honored any agreement they’ve made with Ukraine, and as long as Putin is in power they never will.

Bud, Russia is aggressive because Putin’s entire rise to power was built on manufactured fear. He likely used FSB agents to execute false flag attacks on Russian citizens and blame it on Chechen separatists. He has had to build on that fear to maintain power, developing a mythological Imperial past that was “stolen” by the west. Conquering Ukraine is the first step in “resurrecting” that glorious fiction. Russia will not stop pursuing this fever dream until Putin and his government are gone - they can’t. It’s basically the only thing keeping them in power. I don’t like wars either, but until we can collectively figure out how to stop these authoritarian impulses there just isn’t any alternative. It’s the paradox of tolerance, essentially

“But if your democracy can be destroyed with a few hundred thousand dollars of digital advertising from a foreign country, then it wasn’t very strong to begin with."

I mean, it was more than a couple hundred thousand dollars here in the States, but that’s exactly what has us on the ropes. Propaganda and misinformation delivered via social media is destroying democracy all across the western world.

It’s hard not to be angry at the legion of angry, scared, dimwits that voted for this. It’s also just not productive. In the end, what’s the point of that anger? We have to figure out how to reach those people, and how to cut through the fog of misinformation and propaganda that they are lost in. Things are just going to get worse and worse unless we do.

Can we stop using this Stephen Crowder meme? That guy is the worst

You’re cherry-picking one issue, and ignoring the absolute FLOOD of misinformation and propaganda that is filling those social platforms. Not to mention that those honest critiques of the US’s complicity in genocide are picked up and weaponized by bad actors across the spectrum. Most people have not been taught to critically consume news, they just go on vibes. Corporate news, social media, it’s all broken, and none of it is serving people’s best interests. I would argue that informed voters were stuck between a rock and a hard place; we knew that the Harris campaign was just more neoliberal bullshit, but the Trump vision of the world is so much worse. Social media is causing so much more harm than good, and the people in charge of those platforms absolutely do not have your best interests in mind. All they care about is engagement metrics, and nothing drives that more then anger and fear

https://www.snopes.com/news/2023/08/03/paul-reubens-child-pornography/

He’s right about one thing, he doesn’t deserve to be called “dad”. I think I speak for all us decent dads here when I say any one of us would be proud to have a kid who’s as smart, capable, and levelheaded as you sound. Keep your head down and get out as soon as you can.

This is kind of like a mix of HOMM and the Civ games.

https://store.steampowered.com/app/289130/ENDLESS_Legend/

Some Favorites from this year;

Adrian Tchaikovsky is the best - “The Final Architecture” series is also rad, and his standalone novel from this year “Service Model” was great.

August Kitko and the Mechas From Space by Alex White. “Evangelion by way of David Bowie”

Space Opera Catherynne Valente. A very literal play on the genre!

Fractal Noise & To Sleep in a Sea of Stars Christopher Paolini

Murderbot Diaries Martha Wells

I mean, someone definitely is in this scenario, but I don’t think it’s me lol